


The Garden

by minetsu



Category: Ouran High School Host Club - All Media Types
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Bullying, Drama & Romance, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Mental Anguish, Mental Instability, Mommy Issues, Other, Past Child Abuse, Romance, Rumors, School
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-11
Updated: 2020-03-11
Packaged: 2021-03-01 03:46:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,760
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23108710
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/minetsu/pseuds/minetsu
Summary: “Why?” His eyes glimmer as his permanent smile droops into an expression of disappointment.“Why are you avoiding me? Do you hate me or something?”Words catch themselves in your throat, accumulating with all the possible replies. You couldn’t possibly confess right here, especially with your circumstances, but he sought you out in hopes of an answer, and you didn’t even know how to provide him with one.“Someone...,” You choke, eyes fixating on the damp blades of grass below you. He grows confused, waiting for you to continue your explanation.“Someone I know is in love with you.”
Relationships: Suoh Tamaki & Reader
Kudos: 28





	The Garden

**Author's Note:**

> This work is meant to portray the story of one of my own original characters. I wrote this with the intention of putting the reader in her shoes, and living her story in a way where you are able to relate and feel for her the same exact way that I am. That being said, this is still an 'x reader' nonetheless, and I hope this story of both love and healing is enjoyable for anyone who reads it. Thank you so much. 
> 
> takoyyo

_ He was there again.  _

Sure, you were expecting him to be at your lunch table today, and sure, every girl in your class had been looking forward to it—but you couldn’t shake the nervousness out of your skin the moment you saw him. Your closest friend had found her new obsession. She often fell into another obsessive episode every few months, finding each and every minuscule detail about her target until she realized he wasn’t perfect. The process was strange to watch, as she never confessed, or dated any of these targets, but you knew that this one could possibly be the last.

He was a perfect boy, Tamaki Suoh, and she knew that from the start, which is why your feelings had disturbed you so greatly when you realized ‘it’. The way your breathing faltered whenever he was around, or was it the beating of your heart that revealed ‘it’ to you? You hated how excited you were to see him there, and though you avoided him for this whole week, you took another chance, hurrying back into the hallway without even shutting the door behind you.

The ethereal light drapes from the windows to the floors like a blanket, warming your cold skin in the process. Why must it be him? Your mind races, jumping from question to solution again and again, though none of them can possibly correlate. The next time you’re taken from your thoughts, you find yourself in the rose garden, surrounded by different hues of reds and pinks. 

Taking a deep inhale, you let your mind rest for a moment, admiring the delicate drops of morning dew on the petals and leaves. All falls quiet for a moment, before his voice fills the air with angelic noise. 

_ “I was wondering where you ran off to.”  _

Tamaki laughs, the sun setting his hair aglow as the light bathed his skin. You can’t help but feel as if your heart is caught in your throat, while your eyes are caught in his stare. Had he followed you? You were sure he didn’t notice you left, but his gentle grin says otherwise. He seemed so genuine, despite only speaking to you a handful of times. 

“I never see you around anymore. I was starting to wonder if you’re doing it on purpose.” 

You’re silent. He expected this though, but he was still sure he would lure you out of the shell you hid yourself in. You were alone most times, despite always traveling with the group of girls in your class. They were all friends, and he would have assumed that you would be included in it, but your reclusiveness seemed to hint at something else. 

“Nothing?” 

Tamaki’s arms fold, and he doesn’t say anything else for a while. His expression is hard for you to read, and by now, the thumping in your chest seemed to get ever-louder. How could you hide it? He steps forward. You step back. What if he heard? He was bound to if he got close enough! 

The corners of his lips dip into a small frown, his eyes losing their excited sparkle that they always had. In reality, he had only joined Junior High a month or two ago, and this was the first time he had ever met someone who actively avoided him.

_ “..Why?” _

You’re able to croak out a response with a voice soft enough to be carried off in the wind, but with confusion that almost seemed innocent. 

“What—?” You reply, hands nervously gripping the hem of your shirt. “What do you mean..?”

“Why are you avoiding me?” 

Your heart drops into your stomach with the knowledge that you had caused him to feel bad. Initially, Tamaki seemed like the type that wouldn’t notice if you were present or not, especially because he was always surrounded by people who loved him. Perhaps he truly did want to befriend you? After all, there could be nothing more of anything like this. Even if you admired him, he could never be yours to admire. 

_ “Do you hate me, or something like that?”  _

You frantically shake your head in denial. “No—!” You manage to swallow your stutter. “Why do you follow me? Do you like me, or something?” The words come out in a single breath, and the moment they do, both of you flush innocently. After all, you are both are still so young. His hand clasps over his mouth, which was agape in surprise, while his cheeks burned red, and all other hues were lost. 

“I-I’m so sorry,” you exhale, “I didn’t mean it like that-“

“No no,” Tamaki laughs, the hearty melody in his chest ringing through your ears, resonating through your heart. His face made you happy that you were already embarrassed, or else your feelings would’ve been exposed. “It’s alright. I don’t like anyone yet.” With arms unfolding, he comes closer, the beat echoing throughout the world, yet falls on his deaf ears. “I’m curious though, why do you stay away from me if you don’t hate me? All of your friends get along just fine.” 

At this, your smile starts to drop. He watches as your soul peaks out for a moment, teetering on the line between telling the truth or giving a facade. 

_ “One of my friends is in love with you.”  _

You can’t say her name, you never will. No matter how interesting or kind he could be, you won’t be able to love him more than her. Thus, you would never betray her like that. “I don’t want to upset her, or distract you.” Granted, this was a lie. In most (if not all) crowds, you were no distraction. You didn’t speak unless spoken to, and often flourished most when you were alone. 

“Ahh, I see.” Tamaki doesn’t seem surprised, shoulders slacking and his hands falling to his sides. He often received confessions from girls whether they were in his class or not, and despite his loving, princely nature, he always declined. “So you were being careful! How sweet.” He declares, excited. “You must really love your friend, I’m sure she appreciates your efforts. But trust me, you’ve been quite the distraction since we’ve met.” He’s chuckling again, and you can’t help but feel embarrassed. 

“I have..?”

He nods, taking your hand in his, before guiding you towards the gazebo, a place the high-school students were frequently caught skipping class or kissing. You were doing neither, but the thought flustered you nonetheless. 

“Of course!” Tamaki had been surprisingly calm up until now. When he spoke to you, he seemed especially tame, but in groups, he flourished immensely. He had his own hand at flirting and charming girls his age, whether it was with a sweet smile or a genuine compliment;he hadn’t said anything of the like towards you quite yet, as if you were off limits. “You’re so nice to everyone, and you didn’t even say a word to me!” He pouts childishly, gripping your hand with both of his. “I thought I did something, you know? I would never want to hurt a lady!” 

“I’m sorry!” You squeak, and he laughs in response. 

“Your reaction was exactly what I was looking for.” It was the first time someone hadn’t swooned in front of him, but it’s also the first time he’s acted a fool in front of a girl since he’s moved here. “I’m not upset with you, your circumstance is difficult. But even still, I want to be friends with you.” 

“But—“

“Your friend won’t be hurt, I promise. Each day, if you would like, I’ll tell you something about me. Then, you can tell her all about me.” 

“Are you suggesting that we meet here each day.”

“I would like it if we did.”

His voice is soft again, almost as if it were done on purpose. Tamaki wasn’t the manipulative type, yet somehow you found yourself wanting to come back tomorrow, and the day after that, and the day after that. 

“There’s no harm in friendship, I’m sure.”

“That’s true.” You comply, and he lets go of your hands. Just friends. You both would only be friends. She wouldn’t be upset with that, right? “What about today? What will I tell her today?”

“You’re quick!” Tamaki grins, folding his arms against the old marble table and leaning forward, soaking in each word that left your lips.

“Hush!” You try not to laugh. Just friends. You have to remember. Just. Friends. “I have to tell her something when she asks.” 

It falls quiet between you both again, he looks towards the arches of the gazebo, and to the tall rosehedges beyond. Rubbing his chin in thought, Tamaki closes his eyes, before taking a dramatic inhale.

“Tell her I love roses.” 

“Roses? Do you really?” Had he been making something up? If you had to tell your friend something about him, you at least wanted it to be true. 

“I do. My mother used to tell me about the language of flowers, and they’re her favorite, and after a while, they’ve become mine, too.” 

“I think I’ve heard of something like that existing, but why would they be your favorite?” You hadn’t said it, but roses were rather common amongst flowers, and though they were romantic, you figured he would have said something else.

“Well, in the terms of floriography, roses translate into love, romance.. but also, secrecy.” he starts, his hands brush against the vines that grew up the marble pillars. “There’s this saying from ancient times: ‘sub rosa’.” You listen intently, his slender fingers moving to admire a single rose with ruby red petals spreading and unraveling like the layers of a beautiful dress. “It means ‘under the rose’, it’s a promise of silence, if you will.”

Your eyes meet again, the gentle snapping of a stem sounding crisp and fresh in comparison to the mellow affections in his words. You have to remind yourself again: [I]just friends, just friends. 

Tamaki stands and leans ever closer to your side of the table, where he holds the rose above your head. 

“I’ve never told anyone that before.” He confessed.

“And you tell me?” 

“And your friend.” His eyes glimmer. “I won’t tell anyone else about meeting here, with you.” 

“I won’t either.” You exhale. This would be your secret, amongst all the others you carry. 

“Sub Rosa, Princess.” He grinned, gently shaking the rose above you, as to remind you what it meant, before tucking it between your nimble fingers. You blush. 

_ “Sub rosa, Tamaki.” _


End file.
